Santa Lechuga Power League:

The Best Damn Fantasy Baseball League In the Universe! (Yes. Universe.)

by Brandon Olivarria


Note as of 11:38 am on 6/4: Stats and standings for last night’s games have now been updated. I am sill having PC problems, but I used my trusty backup.

Well, the weekend started Thursday night with a late night flight from Austin, TX into SFO. The joy of No Greinke My Wankee owner
Miss Peyton Markie Olivarria walking the line was the main reason for the trip. However … the weekend ended up being one of those weekends we will be talking about every time we all get together. Nothing can take away from Peyton's accomplishment, but WOW!

Friday: Peyton's Big Day!
Friday went off without a hitch … if you were part of another family, but our family, well, not so much. The running around and the last minute preparations for Saturday’s party created a long morning. Then, at the graduation itself, having to sit through 350-plus horribly butchered names, the sunburns, and the horrible last-minute speeches made it all worth finally hearing the name we were all there to hear: “Peyton. Markie. Olivarria!” Echo throughout the PIT!

“Peyton. Markie. Olivarria!” Cue the Pit!

Saturday: Party!
Saturday started with all the guys strategically planning a round of golf while the ladies stayed home and put on all the finishing touches. The party began around 5 pm with family and friends coming to congratulate Peyton. What would go down in a few short hours miss Cleo couldn't have predicted. THE DANCE OFF!!! Star of this would have been -- drum roll, please … Hamiltoes owner TYLER SHADDY! The breakdancing moves this white kid was putting down took me back to the movie Beat Street! All that was missing was the Super Fly Adidas track suit.

This video isn’t sideways. That’s just how Tyler dances.

After Tyler finished wiping the floor with his horrible dance moves, the party continued in the backyard. At this point, the (in)famous GOLDEN SOMBRERO was retrieved from the wall of trophies! It was only fitting I represent my 29th place team with some good luck! Kempin' It Real! owner Kyle Harmon refused to wear it for reasons we do not speak of. Okay, we’ll speak of them: He said he did not want to jinx Chris Davis, the only reason Kempin' It Real! is currently in the Top 10.

Golden Sombrero

The end of the night ends in walk-off fashion! Or, for our non baseball fans, homicide. One of our beloved family members, who we have been trying to persuade to join our wonderful league, Dan the Pirate, decided he was calling it a night. Boy did he. Dan did his best to audition for an upcoming role in Law and Order SVU. So we did our best Stabler and Benson impressions.

The Pirate
Dan the Pirate. Calling It A Night.

Like I said at the beginning, a weekend that will continue to be talked about for a long time!

But let us not forget the real reason we were all able to come together: Peyton's graduation. Congrats, Peyton, you have made all of us so proud! Once a cowboy always a cowboy!

Editor’s Note: How is it possible that the Livernoises and Klinkhamers haven’t ended up at the same party as the Olivarrias? Or would that rip the space-time continuum and bring the planet to screeching halt?

Standings: At-A-Glance . Overall . Division . Hitting . Pitching . Power-Hitting Pitching . HOF . Yesterday
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